What's her mistake ? - 47

I could not help feeling very angry with his words. But we were helpless. Even the talkative Dammu had kept her mouth shut and was thinking deeply.

We cleared the room and came back to Dammu’s house.

We felt as if some part of our body has suddenly cutoff. It was very difficult even to spend two days in Dammu’s house. I tried to read. I was not able to concentrate. I tried to tend the rose plants. I must have got pierced all my fingers. I could not do cleaning.

I went and stood in front of Dammu who had kept a book in her left hand and was looking beyond. I knew that she was also going through the same condition.

“Tell me young man! You are finding it difficult to stay. Correct? Ok, here it is! We will do like this. You stay here till the end of this week. In the meanwhile I shall help you to get a good and suitable job” I smiled thankfully. “Oh yes, I remember my promise. When Nammu is not here, there is no point in you staying here and wasting your quality time.  I have spoken to the owner of the opposite house. He has a room in the first floor and would be happy to give it to you for rent. You have done a good job of taking care of Nammu and me. So now it is time for you to take care of yourself. Oh, yes, I am fine. Remember what the oncologist said? Some are lucky to survive cancer and I am one of them” said Dammu with a sad smile.

Within a week I joined a job, shifted to the opposite house. I was not very comfortable to eat at Dammu’s. She understood my plight and let me live the way I wanted. But I still carried out some of the chores of her house to keep myself busy during my time off.

The oncologist regretted the fact that the discharge of Nammu Aunty took place during his absence. When he tried to contact her sons, they were very rude with him and told him that he should not bother them again asking money etc. as they are having their mother with them. Nammu Aunty’s daughter had recovered from her accident. But still the money position was bad taking into consideration the treatment to her injuries.

When I met Dammu on Sunday, I narrated the whole thing. She said, “Young man! I am getting a doubt because whenever the oncologist called each of the sons, they have individually declared that their mother was with him. How is it possible? If she was with the third one, the other two could tell that he is with the third one. Right? But why such a lofty reply?”

I called the third son from her house. He came on line and blasted me for making enquiries. “Don’t you have your own business? Why you want to poke your nose in our affairs?  Amma is with us and she is happy.”

I suddenly asked him, “Why are you saying ‘us’? Is she with you? If so, please put her on the line. I want to speak with her”

He did not reply. He put the phone down. I looked at Dammu sadly.

It was almost 2 months since Nammu Aunty was taken away from the hospital. We had slowly fitted into our new routine.

That evening I went to Dammu’s house since she called me. She said, “I had got some samosas prepared. I thought I should give them to you. Please have it” and handed over a plate full of samosas.

“Young man! It is two months since Nammu is away. Any news from your side?” she asked.

Tucking in the tasty samosa I regretfully said, “No Dammu!”

As if to make my words a lie, the telephone rang.

I picked up the receiver. Someone said, “Is there a Dammu available in this number? I have a call”

I gave it to Dammu. She said “Hello!”

Her expression suddenly changed from surprise to happiness and she shrieked, “Nammu!”

What's her Mistake?- 46

We rushed to meet the oncologist’s assistant. Strangely his chamber was empty. The receptionist told that he went out on an urgent job.

This became more and more intriguing.

We checked the discharge papers. There was in inscrutable signature.

We were very worried.

Dammu said, “Young man! This is crazy. You get a call and you leave Nammu alone. As if waiting for that moment, someone has got Nammu discharged from the hospital. We will check with the nurse who was in the nurse’s station at that time”

We went to the nurse’s station. The nurse who had been on duty when we had gone out had left for the day. I called her on her mobile.

“Oh yes, I remember. Nammu Aunty. Sweet lady! She should have been in hospital for some more days. But he insisted that he wants to take her with him” she said.

Dammu was next to me straining to hear the words. She pulled the mobile from my hand and spoke to the nurse. “Sister, can you tell me who signed for her discharge summary?”

She heard the reply, thanked her and disconnected the phone. She looked at me and said, “Strange!”

“What Dammu?” I asked eagerly.

“She has been taken out of the hospital by her son!” Dammu had a faraway look in her eyes.

“What is strange Dammu? Nammu Aunty was always craving to be with her sons. So, she has been taken by him” I said.

“Young man! Think for a moment! She was not wanted by the sons when she was healthy. But why they want her when she is so sick?”

It was only after some time that I realized the meaning of her sentence. In fact, I was the only one who was talking to them. Come to think of it! All my communication was only with the third son. I immediately called his office. It went to the board which gave a standard message to call in the morning.

“It is nearing nine pm. So, let us wait till morning” Dammu said and decided to stay in the room in case they have a change of mind and bring back Nammu Aunty.

When we called Nammu Aunty’s third son’s office’s landline number we were in for a surprise. He was on leave from past week. He was to join after 2 days.

“Young man! Let us talk to the other two brothers also” said Dammu.

When we contacted the second son’s number, the reply was the same. He was not there from past 4 days. We were convinced that all the three brothers have joined hands and hatched a plot when the first son was also out of his office.

We could not get their respective wives on line because they were not listed in the telephone book. I thought what type of people are they? They do not even to have contact with the outside world. Or is it a ruse to be away from people and live behind closed doors?

“The Assistant oncologist! We will check with him!” I said remembering then. That guy had a funny smile. What’s it? Ah, a sly smile!

“Dammu! Some authorized personnel only could allow a discharge of a patient. Let us talk to him” I said and went to his room.

He was sitting entering some data into the computer. He started when he saw us. But still, he tried to put a brave face.

“Yes, I signed her discharge papers! What is the harm? She has not been kidnapped. It is her sons who have taken her out of here” he defended his action.

Then he called us to come near to him and whispered, “You know something? She is really at the end of her life. It is not known whether she will talk again. It is waste to keep her here. She better be with her sons during her last few days” 

What's her mistake ? - 45

We sat in front of Nammu Aunty. After the oncologist left in a hurry, his assistant shifted Nammu Aunty to a ward. On the insistence of Dammu we got a special room for Nammu Aunty.

Nammu Aunty had opened her eyes and trying to speak. But she could not speak. She started making signs for everything. We had difficulty in even understanding her signals because she had become very feeble. She was not able to even lift her hands.

Dammu was putting a brave face. She was full of tears when she was outside Nammu Aunty’s room. The moment she came to see Nammu Aunty she tried to be cheerful.

“Hey, when will you speak? I am eager to hear your voice. The oncologist says you will get back your voice and this is only a temporary setback” said Dammu.

Nammu Aunty just smiled.

Dammu had brought a book with her. I saw the title. The Vedanta Treatise. “I want to read you some passages out of this” she said and turned a few pages and started reading.

“Human beings undergo what is called Janmas or births. Their atma or soul leaves the old body like a used cloth and get into a new body which can be compared to a new cloth. When we take new birth, we carry what is called the Vaasana or the trait. This decides our behavior in our next birth. When we take birth, our Karma follows us. There are three types of Karmas. Praarabdha, Aagami and Sanchita” Dammu stopped as Nammu Aunty was trying to say something with her hands.

“What?” she asked and since she could not understand what she was trying to say she continued reading. “The praarabdha karma is like sprouted seeds. This is something we have to eat. No choice for us. If we start to do good deeds and stop harming others, the Aagami Karma which is about to sprout will get burnt into ashes. If we continue to do good deeds and keep God in our mind always the Sanchita karma which is storage of our previous karmas gets totally destroyed. Then we can be sure of a berth at the heavenly abode of the Lord without any more re births. We have...” she stopped when she felt Nammu Aunty’s feeble hand touching her hand.

“What?” Dammu asked.

“Dammu, I think she wants you to be jovial as usual. She doesn’t want heavy stuff from you!” I said and I could see a faint smile on Nammu Aunty’s face.

Dammu brought her laptop.”I don’t know the title because it was given to me from someone” she said looking at the nameless DVD.

On Nammu Aunty’s insistence Dammu played the movie. To her dismay it turned out to be the Hindi Movie ‘Anand’ where the hero knows that he has blood cancer, but he will be looking at life positively. The movie made us smile, but I could see both Nammu Aunty and Dammu had tears rolling down their cheeks. The irony of the movie was that the name was Anand, but there was an undercurrent of sadness. Almost similar to the two cancer patients in the room.

We were silent for most of the balance of the time that day.

The silence was shattered when Dammu got a call. Dammu spoke with her in a grim tone and looked at me and said, “Please be with Nammu. I have to go. The call was from my lawyer. He says I have to go and sign some papers.”

She told Nammu Aunty. She just nodded.

After Dammu left I was sitting next to Nammu Aunty and reading a book. Nammu Aunty looked peaceful.

Then I got a call from the lawyer’s office. The voice said that he is the assistant of the lawyer and I was required to go there urgently.

When I told I have to look after Nammu Aunty, the voice said, “You tell the oncologist’s assistant to take care of Nammu till we come back” .

I saw Nammu Aunty peacefully sleeping. I went to the assistant and told him to take care of Nammu Aunty.

He smiled and nodded.

I do not know why, I suddenly had a doubt on him. But I was not able to pinpoint the feeling.

I traveled a long distance to get to the lawyer’s office. When I reached Dammu was just leaving. She was surprised to see me. When we enquired about the call, it turned out to be hoax. Suspecting a foul play we called the Oncological Center. We did not get a proper reply. So we rushed back to the Center and to Nammu Aunty’s room.

To our horror, Nammu Aunty’s bed was empty. All her things were missing.

What's her mistake ? - 44

“She is totally exhausted” declared the oncologist when we rushed her to the Oncological Center. We had a scary time on the road in the car when Nammu Aunty suddenly lost consciousness.

Dammu screamed and shook Nammu Aunty quite strongly. We thought Nammu Aunty had left us forever. But may be Dammu’s screams made Nammu Aunty to come out of her deep sleep state. She moved her fingers. Immediately Dammu felt her pulse and hastened the driver to rush to the Oncological Center.

Nammu Aunty was shifted to the Intensive Care Unit. She was breathing normally now.

“Sir, you said she can stay there and be happy for the rest of her life, we found that she is down and out within a week?” Dammu was very indignantly.

“Damayanti Madam! Please understand my point. She is at the critical stage of cancer. She may collapse anyday. So, I suggested that let her be happy at least for a few days when she is alive” the oncologist’s tone was very grave.

Both of us sat in front of the ICU on the chairs. Nammu Aunty did not open her eyes for 4 days. She was responding to the medicine was the only good news we heard.

After three more days, Dammu asked me “Please go to the village Jaaji and tell them that Nammu is not well. And she would not be able to come to take classes for at least two months. I will request her, cajole her, force her.... somehow I will make her stay back. I can’t lose her young man! I don’t want to lose her!” she closed her face with her hands. I could see that she was totally emotional.

I went to the village and broke the news. They were feeling sorry for Nammu Aunty. All the kids made me wait. After an hour I was given a get well soon card and all the kids had signed in the card.

I came back to the hospital. Dammu was not outside ICU. I came to know that she was inside with Nammu Aunty who was awake.

Dammu came out. Her face was dull. I wondered why and went inside. Nammu Aunty was awake. She feebly smiled at me. I handed over the greeting. She peered at it. Then the tears started coming out from the edge of her eyes.

She opened her mouth to say something. But words did not come out. It was as if she could not speak. I was dumbstruck. I could now understand why Dammu had a dull face when she came out of ICU.

I bade goodbye to Nammu Aunty and joined Dammu in meeting with the oncologist.

“Yes, she won’t be able to talk temporarily” he declared and added “hopefully”

“Sir, is she that bad?” asked Dammu with a choking voice.

“Madam, all won’t be lucky even after chemotherapy. You are one of the luckier ones who are living a normal life even after the cancer attacked you quite badly. Probably the cancerous growth has stopped in your cells. But Nammu may not be that lucky” said the oncologist as a matter of fact.

Nammu Aunty was not able to talk. She was showing signals for everything. She was very eager to know whether the kids have been informed about her absence.

The oncologist came in a hurry and told that he had to go out of station for a week. He asked Dammu to be with Nammu Aunty. Of course, not inside the ICU. But outside.

He called me separately and told, “Can you contact her sons? I need to tell them that she is nearing her end”

I was stunned and asked him, “You said she will recover?”

“I think all the efforts of human beings have been completed. Only HE can save her now” said the oncologist.

I had a knotty feeling in my stomach. I could not digest the news.

What's her mistake? - 43

“There are 40 to 50 parts of the body which are susceptible to get cancer. I am not trying to scare you. I am trying to help you find out how to avoid the disease” said Nammu Aunty after the murmur died down.

Then she explained how to avoid the disease. Hygiene is one main thing to be carried out. We have to ensure that we wash all the vegetables and fruits which we take to eat. We have to keep the surrounding and the toilet clean. By clean environment, we would be avoiding the invasion of houseflies and mosquitos who are carriers of many diseases. Cancer is one big disease. But by being clean and alert, we could avoid even a small disease. We have to get our children to the doctor when they fall sick. Not rush to a medical store ask for some adhoc medicine.

“I have been told by a doctor that the children get fever a few hundred times. But each fever is different. They develop antibodies each time they get fever. We need to give them the antibiotics. We should ensure that the course is completed. We should not stop the medicine in between just because the kid’s fever gets subsided.”

I was surprised that Nammu Aunty knows so much about all these. May be she was always concerned about the society and its methods. When she found a platform she went on giving the people small tips.

When we were back in the house I asked her, “Nammu Aunty! You are so surprising! I have never seen you like this, when Uncle was with you or when you were alone your relative’s house!

Nammu Aunty smiled and said, “Son, I was always interested to help the society even in the smallest possible way like the squirrel which helped Lord Sri Rama during the building of bridge to Lanka. I am happy that there is awareness. Being forewarned is to be forearmed. I do hope the people take seriously whatever is important” she said fervently.

The week passed. Kids came home presenting us with different vegetables and fruits. Every day Nammu Aunty went on teaching the kids about many things. Sometimes it was just fun and games. But her idea was that if something is required to be long-lasting, then it has to be when the kids are adolescent. They are on the verge of embracing either good or bad. If we turn them towards the good, they remain good.

She taught them about very simple things which were not even thought of generally. When she finished telling the kids, there would be a sound of ‘Ohho’. Meaning, we knew about this, but we did not know this!

Suddenly it was Friday evening. Even though Nammu Aunty looked healthy, she was becoming more and more fragile.

Is she surviving only on willpower? This question was bothering me when we were standing in the bus stand to catch the bus to the city.

Suddenly Dammu’s car appeared round the corner and stopped in front of us.

When we opened the door, we even saw Dammu sitting at the back seat and smiling at us.

“Ha, you two are very bad! You have company of each other. But I am really feeling lonely!” she spoke in mock anger.

“Sorry Dammu! I was busy” said Nammu Aunty in a guilty voice.

“I know. I was getting information about you from this young man! Right young man?” Dammu directed the question to me.

I just nodded. Yes, I was keeping Dammu informed about Nammu Aunty’s health. Dammu had clearly told. Do not disturb her. Help her in all ways. But let her not have tension. She wanted to be in the village in the house of her husband. Let her be! Your job is to look after her well – were the instructions of Dammu to me! I did it to the core.

“Sorry Dammu, I should have spoken to you” Nammu said. I looked at them from the front seat. Nammu Aunty was holding the hand of Dammu. “Good thing you agreed to send me. The kids called me Nammamma! Wow, it was a great feeling to have. Now I am a mother of about 20 apart from my own. Oh, this is great. I shall go on teaching them many more things till .....” the sentence was never finished.

As I looked with horror, Nammu Aunty’s head suddenly rolled on the lap of Dammu.

“Nammu!” Dammu screamed. The driver swerved the car to the left and stopped.

“Nammu, wake up!” shouted Dammu and started shaking her. Nammu was as still as a stone idol.

What's her mistake? - 42

The class was conducted below the peepul tree which was just at the entrance to Jaaji. The green leaves with their pointed edge were swaying due to the gentle wind blowing.

There were 4 new students, two boys and two girls.

They were very eager to listen to Nammamma as they fondly called her.

 “Dear children, we were speaking about hygiene yesterday and two of you mentioned the two most dangerous diseases. One of them is Aids. The other is cancer”

“Children! Do you know what cancer is?” Nammu Aunty asked.

“We know it is a disease Nammamma!” said the bold girl.

“It is a disease. But dear children, there is a saying that prevention is better than cure. If we prevent something bad from happening, we are saved. If we, unfortunately, still contact the disease we have to take steps to cure it”

Now there were quite a good number of men and women who were the parents of the children who had come to attend the classes and also parents of very small kids.

“We have to take steps to keep ourselves clean in our habits. We should not indulge in vices like smoking and drinking even for the first time. I have seen people saying we do it only for curiosity. Why curiosity? If you want to have curiosity, have it in finding out something new. How things work? How a plant grows? How a flower blooms? How does it rain? Why we should have more trees in our surrounding? Questions like these will help in expanding our knowledge”

Nammu Aunty went on talking about so many things. Kids were very happy to listen to the talk. They even asked very apt questions and got replies. When the questions were not answerable, Nammu Aunty asked me to note down the questions so that she could get prepared the next day with the replies.

“I am not an expert in anything. But I have studied some important points. I would like to share with you. Is it ok?” She asked.

The kids said ‘yes’ in chorus.

“What Is Cancer?” started Nammu Aunty and continued, “Cancer is a group of diseases characterized by uncontrolled growth and spread of abnormal cells. If the spread is not controlled, it can result in death. Cancer is caused by both external factors (tobacco, infectious organisms, chemicals, and radiation) and internal factors (inherited mutations, hormones, immune conditions, and mutations that occur from metabolism). These causal factors may act together or in sequence to initiate or promote carcinogenesis. Ten or more years often pass between exposure to external factors and detectable cancer”

There was silence in the crowd. I could see that the kids did not completely understand what has been told. But there were a few elders who were showing expression of shock and fear.

“Don’t worry. There are some curing methods too. Cancer is treated with surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, hormone therapy, biological therapy, and targeted therapy. You may not be able to absorb all these words. But you should remember that we could avoid what can be avoided. Right?” Nammu Aunty smiled.

“For example, if a father keeps the child on his shoulder and goes to a store and smokes a bidi or cigarette, the kid gets affected from a very small age. Is it not avoidable?” she asked.

“Yes!” said one or two men from the crowd. They were shamefaced. May be they were carrying their child on their shoulder while smoking.

“Can cancer be prevented?” She asked and replied herself. “All cancers caused by cigarette smoking and heavy use of alcohol could be prevented completely.”

“Smoking causes lung cancer. The drinking causes liver cancer. When we have so much of responsibility, is it not our duty to shoulder them without getting sick? The kids are dependent on us. If we fall sick, we cannot take care of the family. We even need extra money for cure. Avoiding is the best method. I am telling all this because like I said earlier even immune conditions etc. could bring cancer to a person. Even though that person does not indulge in bad vices. So, should we not take care to prevent this unwanted, dangerous disease?” Nammu Aunty asked earnestly.

“Yes Nammu Amma” shouted a young man from the back

Nammu Aunty gave some horrifying figures. “55000 children are diagnosed with cancer every year in India. Studies show a direct link between increased urbanization and childhood cancer worldwide. Only 5 percent childhood cancer is hereditary. 95% of the causes are external factors viruses, pollution, radiation etc. In 2009 India had only 55 paediatric oncologists. 15 are in Mumbai. Balance Oncologists in cities only. Pediatric oncology not recognized as a specialty in over 250 medical colleges across the country which is alarming. Commonest childhood cancer is leukaemia, lymphomas, brain tumors, bone tumors and soft tissue rank next. Hence please take care of your children. They are the future of this country and all I ask you is that please prevent your kids from diseases as much as possible”

A  person in the crowd asked, “Have you seen anyone who does not have bad habits but still suffering with cancer?”

“You are looking at one!” Nammu Aunty said pointing to herself. There was a gasp among the audience.

What's her mistake ? - 41

Nammu Aunty did not become dull just because the girl uttered the word cancer. Probably it was the exhaustion which led to the tiredness. I immediately rushed to her and held her and led her to chair and made her sit down.

The lessons of the day took place in a small room in the house of the chief, the smart lady. I bade goodbye to the children myself and led Nammu Aunty to the house.

She slept for some time and then got up to cook. It was a wonder that she could bring so much taste to an ordinary rasam! I think cooking done with shraddha makes it very tasty. The additional taste would be added when the person serves with love and affection.

She did not talk much. She carried one of the many books she brought from Dammu’s house to her bed and started reading.

I shut the house and slept.

I immediately drifted into sleep. Many people started appearing in my dream. I saw Nammu Aunty’s husband, her sons and the daughter. I saw the oncologist and Dammu. There were sequences which were totally unconnected. I woke up with a start.

“Son, did you not get sleep?” Nammu Aunty called from the room.  She must have heard me suddenly sit up and cough. ”Have a glass of water, chant the Lord’s name and go back to sleep”

I mumbled an affirmation and tried to sleep.

But now the sleep eluded me. I started wondering about the sons of Nammu Aunty. I even thought about the daughter. Is she okay now? Has she recovered from her injuries she had during the accident? May be the oncologist has the answers.

Are the sons still paying the money for Nammu Aunty? I should call the third son and check.

The day started quite early. By the time I got up, Nammu Aunty had already started preparing coffee in the kitchen.

She greeted me with a ‘good morning’ and handed over a tumbler having coffee. Like I said earlier, I must have been very lucky to drink such a heavenly coffee! I felt so happy just by having a cup of coffee prepared by Nammu Aunty.

There was a knock at the door with a young voice calling “Nammamma! Nammamma!”

Nammu Aunty opened the main door and found one of the students of yesterday’s class. In her hand was an ash gourd. “My mother wanted me to give this to you”

Nammu Aunty took it and smiled at the girl. Then she asked, “See you in the evening?”

“Yes, nammamama” the girl replied and sped to her home.

I spent some time to see whether I can do some gardening. I found the backyard was having a compound made of bougainvillea plants. So, it was safe to plant some vegetable plants.

I started cleaning and digging the place. Nammu Aunty continued reading.  She sat on a small flat stone behind the house below a Honge tree. There is a saying that the shadow of Honge is like mother’s lap. So, a ‘mother’ was sitting below the shadow of another mother’s lap!

We had Ash gourd sambhar and rice. Dammu had sent various types of pickles. So, the food was good.

Nammu Aunty looked peaceful. She even had little more food than the usual. Was it because she was feeling content here?

She did not complain of any pain or irritation. May be the medicines are showing the results. All for good! I thought feeling happy.

I found that Nammu Aunty slept for some time in the afternoon. Her lesson was to be at 5 pm.

I took the chance to call the oncologist to know about Nammu Aunty’s sons and daughter.

The oncologist said that since two months the money has not come from her sons. The daughter seemed to have a very slow recovery. But still a long way to go.

“I did not insist to her sons to send money because Damayanti has promised to look after Nammu. But I feel the sons are hatching a plot. They are too silent for comfort. Can you check please?” he said.